Luke Fenwick - Life & Leadership Coach Melbourne

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My rationale for my irrational thinking


3min read


6 step process to get your mind from irrational back to rational

“I can’t because [insert personal rationale]”
"I won’t because [insert personal rationale]”
“I'm not good enough because [insert personal rationale]”

“That happened, so this will happen NEXT!”

… these are some of the irrational thoughts that creep into our mind at the worst possible time.

You know, just before that big presentation and your mind starts to think about every negative scenario that could occur because of ONE that happened 5 years ago.

What about “I just had an argument with my partner so, the love is gone, the relationship is over...we are done.”

The irrational thoughts appear:

  • in the workplace

  • in your relationships

  • in friendships

  • in our lives in general

Now, let’s be clear, everyone will have irrational thoughts but it’s how you deal with them that matters.

Irrational thoughts left unchecked may well lead to a life of anxiety and fear in moments that require you to be balanced, calm and clear.

If you think your irrational thoughts are actually serving a real purpose and are based on solid foundations...

Now, that's BS!

B is for Behaviours

Irrational thoughts are thoughts that are:

  • Based on past experiences

  • Based on imagined outcomes

  • Fictitious and not evidence-based

Irrational thoughts are absolutely BS in every sense of the term.

Everyone can get them but they are most frequent in people who have a tendency to often worry, overthink, procrastinate and ruminate.

Some scenarios where irrational thoughts might come up:
“That person looked at me, they must be talking to their friend about me and it’s bad.”
“I am new to this company,
I can’t ask that basic question as it proves I can’t do the job.”
“My presentation is not 100% flawless,
everyone will think it sucks.”

You get the picture… it is imagining wild outcomes based on what? Your past? A fictitious world you simply create in your mind?

Irrational thoughts are a massive roadblock when you attempt things in life that are certainly anything outside of your comfort zone.

Listening to thoughts based on fiction or a long lost past is what is holding you back from moving forward and achieving success.

C'mon, that's real BS!

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S is for Strategies

So if irrational thoughts are indeed leading you to ruminate and it impacts your life in general, what can you do?

As with limiting belief, we talk about acceptance as a first step. Accept that you do indeed have irrational thoughts and that they do create negative emotions. From there, it’s getting into the details.

Here is an example of a 6 step process to get your mind from irrational back to rational:

  1. Identify the thought: Example “I always fail at new things.”

  2. Find exceptions: “Last week, I achieved a few new things…”

  3. Find the actual facts: “There have been plenty of new things I have attempted and achieved progress and success, look how I actually got here.”

  4. Find a way forward that is reasonable and real: “There will be times I fail, which is ok as long as I learn and progress.”

  5. Create a mantra that resonates with you: “My past does not equal my future, my thoughts are not facts, everyone has failed at some stage and that’s ok.”

  6. Get physical: Find a routine that can be performed daily to give your mind some space and not ruminate.


Irrational in thoughts irrational in words irrational in actions.

Think about that for a moment.

How is that behaviour going to help your long game? Chances are, it’s not.

Irrational thoughts are very common. Accept that you will have them but also accept the fact that you can do something about it. Next time your mind goes irrational, don’t try to rationalise the behaviour, just start doing the 6 steps.

If you are pressed for time, ask yourself this very simple thing:

  1. Is this fact or fiction?

  2. What are my immediate next steps for progress?

Someone else said about this

"Go easy on yourself. Whatever you do today, let it be enough."
Anonymous


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