+ Podcast transcript

#FeministFridays with Sarah Liberty & Luke Fenwick - on redefining masculinity & creating a fulfilling legacy (Podcast)

Sarah Liberty

hello and welcome to feminist fridays your weekly intersectional dose of self empowerment and equality i'm your host sarah liberty coming to your airwaves from sydney and this week we have a guest called luke fenwick who is a man helping men and women thought their shit out find their legacy and reinvent themselves but before we meet luke i'd like to kick off with a track by digitalism called offering because hear it come in as fridays whilst we love connecting online we're also all about promoting tech life balance

hello luke and welcome to feminist fridays

Luke Fenwick

hi how are you thank you

well i'm good as good as convey after one has been to a dentist so i'd like to start by asking where you grew up and what were some of your early influences

Luke Fenwick

yeah i am maybe i'll focus on maybe those those primary school years i moved around a lot as a as a little boy i went to about eight or nine different primary schools from what i recall i lived in ligon sydney for about 18 months we lived in baulkham hills i believe at the time we lived in hazy for a short period and then we moved around all over victoria and when you when you talk about influences is a really really interesting question because if i try to reflect back and say what influences did i have i actually don't recall too many and i think that might have been just the fact that we moved so so much and i don't think i was i wasn't certainly a very sporty kind of kid i certainly didn't enjoy school you know that's clear in my mind i remember crawling under a principal's desk at one stage or another one waverly i just didn't want to go to school and i think i really struggled with connection to the other kids because we were just moving so much so if i think of some of those influences it's probably more of those kind of ones i know i was really close really close to my mother and you know she passed away a couple of years ago and that's maybe also part of you know my wider story but she was certainly a massive influence my father to a small degree but i certainly don't look back now and go okay or famous figures or movie people or sporting stars or any of any of the like had an influence on my life it was more around maybe in my mind maybe it was yeah there was some enjoyment as a kid but then you know was it also in my mind just this okay what is the next six months kind of bring where are we moving to now what's that going to be like and i think you know reflecting that certainly created some issues you know later on in life older thought

Sarah Liberty

well i can relate actually because i've moved around a fair bit when i was young because my dad is a farmer and so we moved from a number of properties in new south wales to south australia and then we move back to sydney when i started high school so i can kind of relate to that feeling of needing to start over when you you move from one place to another and i was also a little bit naughty at school i didn't climb on anyone's desk but i was slightly rebellious although i was a bit of a nerd as well so i got i got away with the rebel side

Luke Fenwick

yeah i don't recall me being any of the kind of rebellious side i just i just recall more than anything else i think more than just a really quiet shy reserved you know little boy more than anything else and then go okay we're packing up and off we go and that was going to be it but have you found that that has any impacted you later on in life just moving around so much out of curiosity

Sarah Liberty

well...

the thing is i'm actually quite a free spirit and i i love to travel so i think it's probably influenced the fact that i'm very independent and i've lived overseas for a lot of my adult life in london new york paris and jogjakarta so i guess it's kind of in it influenced me you know it was difficult you know in my teenage years kind of navigating that but it also has helped me in a positive way to not be afraid of change and to not just be fearless about you know going to new locations if if the opportunity arises so yeah i think i think it influences people in different ways

Luke Fenwick yeah absolutely you know it's worked out really well for you in regards to not feeling that absolute need to have you know roots firmly in the ground and it's given you that as you said that free spirit to move around and and find your place within wherever the world might be and i think that's just a beautiful beautiful way to approach life in general

Sarah Liberty

thank you so then you went on to a career your earlier career which involved working in high paying corporate roles in places such as moy hennessy with louis return or lvmh and melbourne united basketball club can you tell us why you walked away from these roles and i'm also curious how did this shy boy end up in these you know these kind of quite i guess you'd say high flying corporate roles

Luke Fenwick yeah i kind of worked really hard to get into those corporate roles you know very early on in my career i did retire like many many people i'm 45 now so you know back at that time when i left high school and slept in for a little while and there was a show called donahue on tv and mum finally said get up and you know get out of bed and go get a job so i went worked in retail for many years about 15 years in more and jeanswest and then got into moet hennessy at lvmh and And that was just, you know, hard work that got me there was always, you know, what's the next opportunity? What's the next role? How do I move on to that one, and it was like Next, Next Next, and there was just this driving inside of me. And there wasn't a lot of appreciation for what success I was having. Because at the time I was, okay, let's move on to the next one. So I left retail, when worked for LVMH left there and worked at Melbourne united, I was passionate, absolutely passionate about the sport, love not in a really enjoyed looking up in the stands and seeing the moms and the dads and the kids, you know, enjoying the sport of basketball. So my purpose there was bring it back, bring the sport back, because it had been, you know, not in a great spot for many, many years. And then I left there, and went and worked in an advertising marketing agency and lasted about nine months. And that was a horrible situation for me. And you asked before, you know, why did I leave? Well, I left it there. Because, you know, emotionally, I was a bit of a wreck. To be quite honest, I was really anxious and, you know, not living up to my end of the bargain in regards to being a good dad or a good husband or a good person. And certainly not the best version of myself If anything, was hitting back in the opposite direction. So, you know, there was a good six month period where I was waking, waking up at 4am, every morning, and my body was just kind of churning, churning, churning with this anxiousness of what the day ahead would be. And I remember at the time, you know, my boys, nearly three now. And this was a year and a half, two years ago, walking upstairs and grabbing him in the morning to bring him downstairs for his morning bottle and my legs were just shaking with the adrenaline that had been pumping for hours and hours. So I left there for the fact that, you know, I needed to just get out of that environment. It wasn't a right place. For me, it's certainly right, for a lot of people wasn't right. For me. It was impacting, as I said, My marriage and me being a father and was like, Okay, well, this is, this is not what I want, you know, this is this is time for change, reevaluate and figure out what comes next. So I walked away from you know, that, as you said, high paying corporate job, and move on to something very, very different.

Sarah Liberty

You know, I can relate to so much of what you just told me, because I also worked in, I worked in marketing agencies, PR agencies. And yes, I'm quite high paying corporate roles, and realized at a point that it just wasn't sitting right with me. And now they are now I know that it was because it wasn't aligned with my personal values. And so I come from a media and communications background, that was my undergraduate degree. And I then moved into the human rights and humanitarian sector. And I've been doing that for about seven years. So I can really relate to, to kind of feeling like, this is just not right. You know, I need to I need to make a change. And also the pressure that those sorts of roles can put on you can be really intense. And I'm sorry to hear that you, you know, you suffered that kind of anxiety or the adrenaline, you know, going for months. But I'm excited to know what, what happened next. So, after putting your life and goals into perspective, I understand you're now a life impact. Coach, can you explain to us what that involves?

Luke Fenwick

Yeah, so for me, a life impact coach, you know, there's all kinds of different coaches out there, I think if you walked down the street, you'd probably bump into 10 different versions of what a coach could be. So, you know, I might say, by, you know, what do people usually come to me for and what are they seeking? So, usually I talk to people, you know, women and men of all different ages, whether or not you know, I've got clients that are in their early 20s, all the way through to a gentleman that's 52. And they usually come to me and they're talking about, you know, their place in life right now. Something's not aligned for them. They don't have that kind of passion. I won't use the word purpose, but there's just not that passion, excitement, or general feeling of fulfillment about what's going on in their life now. So I usually work with people to understand, you know, what are the things that are going on right now? Like, what are their habits that you know, could be doing them service or do service, you know, what are some of the economy beliefs and values of what they want life to be? And then I sit down with them and create a structure and a strategy that enables them to start to form and create the life that they would like to have. And this is not around a goal per se. You know, someone doesn't come to me and I say, how you want to get fit? Let's create a goal of running a marathon. We'll sit down and we'll talk about Okay, what holistically Do you want your life to look like? Do you want to live life of you know being authentic with yourself and speaking with purpose and conviction or living purposely is that what you want it to be or do you want something very very different and that's kind of where i look to make impact on someone's life so then look at what is the strategy that suits this person i love sharing with people you know particular might be a particular podcast i listen to you know for me it's how do i create impact in order to get the change that they want to create this fulfilling legacy further down the track

Sarah Liberty that's fantastic and really fascinating and i'm certainly someone who really believes in living a life of purpose and i think it's wonderful that you work with people to do that i don't think i could exist if i wasn't living a life of purpose because i know very clearly what my values are and what i want to achieve and give to the world and everyone's different i'm sure but it's wonderful that you know you're able to help people in different ways yeah to kind of realize that

Luke Fenwick

offer thank you so much and you are right you know everybody is different and you know i would never sit down with someone and say hey quit your corporate job and go be a coach or a life coach or sit on a beach or whatever it is that's not my place to say that with potential clients because because you are absolutely right everybody's different people seek different things at different times of their life and my role is to uncover that in order to have alignment and people feeling better about themselves and what's going on to them you know so good of you to make those changes and walk away from where you were and follow your your vision and purpose and dream or whatever those words you'd like to use and sounds like it's it's doing wonders for you so awesome keep going love it

Sarah Liberty

i will i'm unstoppable and brad will attest to that so you've said in a recent blog post on your site that trying to be perfect is one certain way to screw yourself up because it is impossible i can really relate to that because i'm someone who is perfectionist yet i am conscious about it and i know that i need to be careful not to push myself to match unrealistic expectations that i might place usually that i place on myself are your perfectionist too how did you how do you encourage people to overcome perfectionism

Luke Fenwick

well it's it is such a difficult one to get to the very very bottom of it when we talk about perfectionism and that is often usually what trips people up is because a lot of people say okay i'm a perfectionist but what are you being a perfectionist for is a question i would ask someone is the perfectionist pace because you are looking to have the absolute best quality of whatever it is that you're looking to do are you a perfectionist because you are mindful and worried about other people's opinions of what you're looking to do are you a perfectionist because you're just doing that whole i'm aiming aiming figuring out figuring out figuring out so you actually don't need to you know produce that kind of you know finished product in order to move forward so i always kind of try to get to the bottom of it because usually what you find is if someone is a perfectionist that's nearly at the end of the journey or the rope of what someone's holding on to at the very very start so if you think of something along the lines of you know what is the trigger and what is the action and then what is the impact so for a perfectionist what are the things that the very very start that are driving those things and often you know we are find people are perfectionist on the things that they really love and they have passion for and then what happens is they get so caught up in that i'm passionate about this i want to have perfection on this and they don't then give themselves that is when i need to have it wrapped up and done and moved on to something next sorry how do i help people it is understanding originally like what is driving this and then it's also to go well understanding your decision making process as a person what does that look like and when do we then start to form the here's a line where you need to move on from the task that you're doing because you've identified this is where i slip up into this particular area of life where i'm a real perfectionist versus this one over here we're on not so much so there is a lot of understanding what sits underneath that hood of being a perfectionist and to answer that question in regards to am i a perfectionist i think early on maybe i was and where i was probably tripping myself up of is i was worried about what other people would think of it more than making sure it was Probably the highest quality of work, I was always wanting it to be fantastic and great and all it could be. But a lot of that underlining issue for me was, well, if I don't do my best version, if it's not great, then what is this person going to say about me? What are they going to think about me. And that's, that's not the best place to play when you're talking about being a perfectionist.

Sarah Liberty

So you also mentioned in your blog post that you shared with me some really alarming statistics, which is that globally, men die six years younger than women. And in Australia, three out of four suicides are men. And 95% of people who die at work are men, men under 65, are four times more likely to die of heart disease and women, men under 75 are twice as likely to die from preventable causes than women. As someone who's lost a male best friend to suicide, I know how true some of those statistics are. How do you think we can turn them around? And why winhelp exists? Do you think that men don't reach out for it?

Luke Fenwick

I'm just one side, I'm sorry to hear that a very close friend had that had that path in their life, it's, you know, you never want to hear that and I'm sorry to hear that are generally genuinely mean that it's statistics are mind blowing in regards to you know, what you just reached out. And then there's also I'm starting to do some work to be an ambassador for white ribbon. And there's other absolutely startling statistics when we talk about, you know, men and women. And when we talk about, you know, sexual harassment and things like that, you know, one in two women have been sexually harassed in their lifetime. And from the age of 15, I think it is in in Australia, and, you know, one in four have been emotionally abused, like, these statistics are just, just staggering. And, you know, you ask the question on Why do men not ask for help, when it's, it's so easy to get hold of at the moment. And I think it is that narrative, and that story that is just been put out there for so often, and it's, you know, I'll be fine. She's okay. She'll be right, mate, all of this kind of, you know, rubbish. And, and it's just been compounded over, you know, generation and generation generation that men need to be strong, they need to be brave, they need to suck it up, and they need to not talk about it. And over time, then that can really wear through and then create all of these other emotional issues that then leads to all the other statistics that we're talking about now. So the biggest problem that we have is that I think people and men specifically are simply fooling themselves with what they could be or what the world needs from them, because they've got this vision of what was created. Or what 100 years ago means years ago, when we talk about paving, and, and all this other kind of stuff, it's just, it's just a silly story that we need to get beyond.

Sarah Liberty

I love that he say that it is a silly story. And we do need to get beyond it. And I'm so glad that you're someone who's passionate about changing. So I applaud you for that.

Luke Fenwick

Yeah, thank you, I, you know, my little boys three, or turning three, I should say, at the end of June, we've got a little girl on the way, which could be this afternoon or in the next couple of weeks, we're really not sure. And I kind of look at it and go well, if things just just cannot continue, we cannot have men taking their lives at the right data do we cannot have the sight this, you know, depression and whatnot continue. And we certainly cannot have men protecting women on these these other ways in the right that they do, like, we need to do something about that. And that starts with conversation. And it starts with raising awareness and changing the narrative in the story from where it was into something very, very different. And we all need to do that. And we all need to talk up about it doesn't do us any good. Not.

Sarah Liberty

So speaking of narratives, you've also said that masculinity is not about being a tough guy. And I think that it's, you know, one of the core narratives that men get, unfortunately, fed or influenced by. So what in your mind is masculinity about?

Luke Fenwick

Well, you know, this is an awesome question, because I toss up, you know, in my mind a lot about this one, and I know, when we talk about masculine masculinity, and I'm marking that up, and I haven't been to the dentist, so you're doing so much better. But you know, why, why do we use that now? Because it's easy to label that and it certainly has been that picture that we've used for so long, you know, man must be big and large and muscley and care and not caring, you know, oh, strong and, you know, going out and find finding food and shelter and all this kind of stuff. So for so long, we've used that label to describe what a man should be. Whereas I go, Okay, well, I don't think that's the label that we should be using for men. And I think masculinity is not just this physical stuff, and it shouldn't be a physical stuff, it should be around being brave, and it should be around open, and it should be around, you know, being the leader, and the leader in the right kind of way, it should be about nurturing and giving and caring, like that, for me, is what a, you know, strong person is a strong person leads the way during challenging times, and does not get caught up with, you know, some of these other things that have been fed to civilization. So, you know, you might talk about some other words that men should not be, and for me, the one that sits at the very top, it's controlling, like, that's, that's where all of this goes sideways men is when they choose or wish to be the controlling force within the world that they live in. And that's the problem we have. So masculinity needs to be redefined, it needs to bring in some of these other skills at I don't, don't want to use the word soft skill, because that, again, paints it in the incorrect light, it's it should be a being open to these things being being able to share and give and love and support and bring everything they can to a certain situation.

Sarah Liberty

Amen. But I personally think a man should just be whoever he wants to be full thought in the story. I mean, it doesn't. I'm not encouraging the kind of tough guy narrative, but I just think, you know, men, the word should, I don't like midnight should in my life. So men can be whoever they want. And, yeah, yeah, I

Luke Fenwick

think that's, that's what we should be encouraging people to be being is, you know, whatever they would like to be, but then that goes back to that education piece, right? So make sure that people are having those visions in their mind of what how do you? How do you serve, it's not my place to say to anybody live this way? Or do this particular thing? But it's it is that education that we need to be saying to people, how are you helping those around you? How you uplifting? How are you giving? How are you sharing? Not? How are you? How are you driving, pushing, steering, pressuring? You know, all of those kinds of things that don't serve people around them? Yeah,

Sarah Liberty

Absolutely. So another really interesting thing that you have said, is that humans are the only animal on the planet that have an identity crisis. I find that absolutely fascinating. Why do you think that is? I mean, I'm not saying that you're David Attenborough. So you might not know the exact scientific reasons, but maybe you do. And how can we address these?

Luke Fenwick

Yeah, I won't sit here and try to hypothesize a scientific reason. I know that we are the only creature on the planet to my understanding, I wish I could quite the podcast I was listening to for the learner person that was talking about it. But we are the only person that can sit in a planet in a you know, dark, or sorry, a white room, nothing on the walls and change our, our emotion and feeling like we are the only people that can do that on the planet. We're the only creature on the planet to do that kind of starts with that, you know, why do we have an identity crisis? Again, I think it goes back to that whole of us wanting to fit into the community that we belong to. And that goes back to the days of, you know, early men and women cave, man, okay, I need to fit into this community. Because if I don't fit into that community, then I'm kicked out. And you know, chances are I get eaten by some kind of wild animals. So that I think it kind of goes back there to say, fundamentally, we want to fit into a community, we want to have place. The challenge that we have now when we talk about identity and ask going well, what am I and where do I fit into and all of that story is that like never before have we been bombarded by the vision of what a perfect life could look like, from the moment we get up and we look at our phone, or we look at a TV or we drive down the road and we look at a billboard there is all of these things that absolutely just crash into our head day in and day out that says you should do this, you should own that. This is the shoes, clothes, whatever you whatever you want to say. But like that's where I think a lot of it comes in is that, you know, we no longer a lot of people no longer really spend the time to dig into figuring out who they are and what matters most. They're certainly concerned about what it looks like on the outside, but they might not be doing a lot of the work that goes on on the inside. And that's when we go well. I'm really confused. what should i be a lion doesn't sit there and go dark the lion knows he's the lion you know the turtle knows he's the turtle except for those kinds of crazy instagram videos you might see occasionally where it's a little dog that thinks he's alive but that's another story altogether but you know these other animals aren't doing that whereas we are like we just get lost along the way we get caught up in all of this stuff that we're feared and then we start to question well where am i where am i going what am i doing

Sarah Liberty

yeah i think you're absolutely right about how we're really bombarded with messages about what the perfect life looks like what the perfect person might do might be shouldn't have blown you know it should have by all of these messages sent to us and yeah it's no wonder we have an identity crisis i do i do wonder what would happen if we bombard the dog with this kind of thing but i think that's probably animal cruelty so i wouldn't i wouldn't you know recommend that at home

Luke Fenwick

yeah i've done my i'm sure there's been some studies done somewhere back in the 60s and 70s maybe even in the 90s that would i need to probably look into it i understand that a little bit further but yeah that's that's what it is and then it's just china trying to find our place to fit in and that goes back a very very long time

Sarah Liberty

so you are someone who helps people find their legacy thought their shit out and reinvent themselves how do you do these and what are some of your key tips

Luke Fenwick

yes yes yes look it's not it's not an easy thing by any stretch of the imagination and i always say to people when they start talking about okay well you know i'm trying to find how do i create change in my life and and what's difficult to do is really go on this particular person and i want to have this massive shift into someone else because then you you often find people are really leaving aren't aligned with something very deep inside of them but how do i do that i've mentioned this a few times everything starts with clarity and understanding about what's happening in life and what matters most and where you're looking to get to but clarity does no good unless you have the action and the plan to go forward so a tip to anybody that might be listening to this and saying okay you know things are a little bit out of whack at the moment but i'm not sure what it is every single one of my clients that i sit down with you know early on in their process i give them an exercise and it's called thrive survive and crash dive and i asked them to do that over a number of weeks you know 234 weeks just depending on what's coming back and i asked them to take note of the things that are going on and the the result of what goes on in their life so what makes them thrive gives them great energy enthusiasm absolutely pumps them up for the next day what are the things that they have in their life that they just need to do to survive now some people say surviving is a work thing some people look at going and doing meditation or gym as a survival thing but i started people understand what that survival thing is and then what are the things in your life that make you crash dive so they take energy enthusiasm just that kind of you know opportunity to do these thriving things out out of the equation so i always say let's start there let's actually figure that out first what are these particular things and then how do we give more oxygen to the thriving moments and then reducing the oxygen to the crash dive moments over time so when we start to go there and then we talked i talked to clients and google may it's not about creating a goal and i mentioned that before and everybody's heard of a smart goal specific measurable attainable relevant and time down so that's something that comes later but what i talked to people about is well what is that headline story that you're trying to create for your life and that is that holistic pace that i mentioned at the very very start of our conversation so what are you looking to live by you know what are these kinds of ways and characteristics and when people start to really antun that and they clear on this headline then we start to spend some time on okay let's create habits tiny tiny little habits over a number of weeks i get people to implement in their life and you know where the habits form and this is when prompt ability and motivation and rewards come in and there's a behavioral scientist over in the states called bj fogg and he's fantastic and talks a lot about these so i use that element with clients to say right then we start to bring them better together and you you make enough small inroads into the things that you're looking to achieve aboard with you know celebration making sure that you're using your you know journal that i supply clients to write in and really go well i'm winning at the moment feeling fantastic unstoppable you know the word that you use before how do i get people feeling those things when they're making change in their life and then over time it just gets easier and easier and easier

Sarah Liberty

i love the use it's quite a simple way of putting it what is that headline that you want for your life? Is that what you mean also by legacy?

Luke Fenwick

Well, kind of. So when I talk to people about legacy and, you know, legacy many years ago was, you know, do you have, you know, do you provide a car to your family when you pass away, or some money or a house or whatnot. So when I talk to people about legacy now, for me, that's the entire story of someone's life. It is what people say about you, when you go on, it's the places you go, people you made, you know, the fingerprints to leave on this planet, when it's all said and done. So those kinds of headlines statement, the things that you're doing day in and day out, are leading you to create that legacy or story over that longer period of time. So that on a part of that reflection piece as well, that you signed to people is okay, well, what do you want people to be saying at the end, you know, when you are, you know, hate to say that word on the deathbed or heading towards, like, Well, what do you want to look back at and say, am I proud about these? You know, what are the things that I could have done and should have done? Like, they're the things you don't, they're the questions, you don't want to be having a what could I've done, what I should have done, it's proud about this, these are the changes that I made. This is how I develop myself. This is how I, how I grew, how I evolved, this is how I impacted the community around me. And that's something that you know, your self is doing right now, you know, you're impacting the community around you. And that's part of your headline statement, and certainly be part of your legacy, as you know, as life continues to unfold for you.

Sarah Liberty

So the next question is, as this is a feminist segment, how has feminism been a part of your journey. And just to be clear, I'm an intersectional, feminist. So I believe feminism is essentially about equality for all, not just women's rights.

Luke Fenwick

I think back to my very, very early childhood, and the people that were around me, mum was one of seven or eight kids and her mum passed away, not long after she was born, and then their dad was fairly absent. So I never never knew him and obviously never knew mom's mom. So I think all the way back to the very, very start for me, and I was surrounded by strong, brave, caring women, that opted, nurtured, and guided me as as much as they could, through challenging times. They were pretty poor family. And that was very much my kind of early childhood. And then I think later on in life, my career leading to what it is now was because there was women in my life that absolutely supported me. You know, I talked about when I was back at Meijer and I went from opening shoe boxes into some different roles. And that was because I had some, again, strong, caring, brave, giving, nurturing women in my life that supported my career and move me forward. And then I think of, you know, how my career then panned out? And what are the things that I look to do for myself personally, within those teams, and it was always around? How do I have balance within the team? You know, it was not about, you know, let's hire a man for this, or a woman for this was just how do we create balance? How do we have opportunity? How do we feel like we're creating an environment where everybody can be the best version of themselves. And I don't mean that in a cheesy kind of way. But that was kind of what I wanted to create, just to make sure that everybody felt that that kind of environment, and if they didn't create an environment where someone could come down and sit next to me and say, Hi, I think you need to do something about this, this is my opinion. And I'll always listen to it. And then Okay, where do we go from here. And then when I think now of what's going on, is, you know, my wife loves her career, she's really driven to do well in a corporate role, a big corporate role. So she's a marketing director and a financial services business. And I do everything I can to support her to make sure that she feels that she can give her all in that role. So I do everything around the house, I do as much as I can with that little boy. And I love that, you know, that's part of the role that we're doing now. And you know, when I was leaving my job and you know, forging this business, I said to Joe, you know, you focus on your role, whatever you need to do, you just do it, like I've got everything else I go, I'll just back you and go from there. So I think from the word go, there's always just been really strong, strong female, my life and they've impacted me in so so much like, I just would not be the person I am today if it wasn't for Mum, or the other ladies that have been around and now for me, it's well, how do I how do I help create change in the world that we live in? That's also goes into the piece on why I like to do stuff with, you know what written we'll see where we go. But that's, that's creating the change in the world that exists right now. I'm not sure if that answers your question or hopefully it has I know it was a long winded answer.

Sarah Liberty

No, it's a beautiful story. Thank you so much for sharing that. And, you know, I really respect that, you know, you acknowledge your strong female role models, and also that when you worked in teams, you you focused on creating balance, and that you're so supportive of your wife at the moment. And I, you know, I would count you as a feminist friend, Luke

Luke Fenwick

watts, I like it. Let's go with it. Let's, let's go with it. But um, yeah, like, you just, I just don't get the reason why not? Or I do because, you know, that's, that's the problems that we have right now. But it's just how do we help? How do we support? How do we give every opportunity that we can like that? And I've always tried to tried to do that. I haven't always got a ride by any stretch of the imagination. But then I've, if I've been offered, hey, this is where you've missed, it's okay. Well, right. I need to I need to learn more here. And be better next time.

Sarah Liberty

Finally, I just wanted to ask, Where can my listeners find you, follow you, and support the amazing work that you're doing to impact 1 million lives by 2025. So feel free to plug your website, social media, and where people can find you here.

Luke Fenwick

Awesome. Thank you so much for the opportunity to have this amazing conversation and the shameless plug right now. So yeah, if anybody does want to connect with me, it's Luc fenwick.com. So ru K and then Fenwick fbn Wi ck.com. I'm on Instagram, which is Luke dot Fenwick. And then I'm on LinkedIn, which is just Luke Fenwick. But everybody, it's easy just to go to that website. Luke Fenwick Comm. And connect with me there. I have a newsletter that goes out kind of monthly. I've also started a podcast with guy over in Vancouver at the moment, it's called two dads a coaching conversation about life. If people want to listen to that, they can find that via the website. And yeah, if people just want to reach out and say hello, and and help me on that journey to impact me in lives by 2025. And that might just be to point a friend in my direction for them to listen to a podcast or download a blog, and, you know, maybe just share some of the thoughts that I've got, you know, I'd really appreciate that and value that and if anybody wants to reach out, absolutely, absolutely do that. I'd love to hear from someone.

Sarah Liberty

I am curious, I just have to ask, why did you make that goal of the 1 million lives by 2025?

Luke Fenwick

Crazy, isn't it? My god, it's a big number. So this kind of all was part of this. Okay, well, you know, what do I want these the business today. And you know, my business is called Dawn of legacy and mums middle name was dawn and legacy being the things that we're talking about now. So no, Dawn was about rebirth. And you know, I think mom's probably looking down now going, you know, well done, son, I'm proud of you, hopefully. But when I was doing this, you know, don't have legacy for the name of the business and in house helping people with legacy, it was also Well, what are some really ambitious plans that we can have that hopefully resonate with people? And it's not, it's not about coaching a million people by 2025. But it is about, you know, how do I share my journey thoughts, wisdom, if you want to call it out, or story or just the sound bites that I might be creating with as many people as I can, in order to hopefully, someone just goes, Okay, lightbulb moment, this is what I'm missing in my life. This is how I can make change. If if it's a man out there going, right, I'm missing that at the moment in regards to I need to be better at this great. So for me, it was how do I create a vision that people just kind of get in their minds? A lot of people when they hear that they're like, oh, okay, right, I can see that, like, tell me more, and then it goes from there. So it's a big number. It's about connecting with people as best I can on all these different platforms, and having amazing opportunities to talk to people such as yourself to, just to chat and discuss and go from there, and and then see where it takes me over these next five years. You know, often, we think that we can do amazing things in six months, and we forget how much we can do in you know, four or five or 10 years time. And so we're really, really conscious of that. But that's kind of where it came from.

Sarah Liberty

Well, I think that's a really admirable goal. And, again, I applaud you for it. And I think the work that you're doing sounds fantastic. And I'm sure that you will reach that goal on this podcast. We'll help you do that. So thank you so much for your time. i'm luke and that's a wrap so have a wonderful weekend

Luke Fenwick

awesome thank you so much you know i genuinely genuinely appreciate the time it's been a beautiful conversation i've enjoyed it so so much look after yourself i hope that tooth better and keep doing amazing things that you're doing your your your journey and your legacy and the values and beliefs that you spoke about before are miraculous so keep going i love it hold on

Sarah Liberty

thank you luke thank you well that has been another fierce episode of feminist fridays for this week but before you tune out i'd like to leave you with a track by sia featuring david guetta called floating through space because he wrote feminist fridays we hope you get a chance to float in some way this weekend